Sloth: Tale of the Tape
Rep. McKinney’s case has been referred to a Grand Jury. The old saying that "Even a modestly competent district attorney can get a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich." just may get put to the test here. So with apologies to the wonderfully talented and hopefully “not lawyered up” Nick Bakay, it’s time to go to “the tale of the tape”:
  | Ham Sandwich | Rep. McKinney | Advantage |
Making sense: | As part of a healthy diet | I want to categorically deny that I did anything wrong | Ham Sandwich |
Electibility: | no political career | In a rock-solid moonbat district | Rep. McKinney |
Case: | A strong case based on tastiness | Video tape of incident | Ham Sandwich |
Putirty: | May be “ham and water product” | Only guilty of being in congress while a BLACK WOMAN | Ham Sandwich |
Terrorism: | Haraam, frightens terrorists | Bush knew about 911! | Ham Sandwich |
Shelf Life: | A day or two in the fridge | WAY past the freshness date | Ham Sandwich |
Fans: | Who doesn’t love a nice ham sandwich? | Far left, conspiracy buffs, race baiters | Ham Sandwich |
Alt Fuels: | Ethanol can be a byproduct * | IT’S A PLOT OF THE JOOOOOOOS | Ham Sandwich |
Corn Subsidies: | “Yummy” | The world owes me, pay to restore my old hairdo! | In a shocker: Rep. McKinney |
Handlers: | Must wash hands and wear hairnets | Can’t sleep at night | Ham Sandwich |
So there you have it, it's so simple when you break things down scientifically. In a trouncing that defies the ambiguity of modern politics and law, the advantage goes...to “Ham Sandwich”. It just might be easier to indict a sitting Representative then a Ham Sandwich when the law has been broken, thus all things are possible. Until next time, I'm The Sinner reminding you the numbers never lie.
Linked: basil's blog and TMH Bacon Bits
Update: It's a Ridge-o-Lanche! Thanks Dave!