« Home | Envy: Connections » | Lust: Conclusive Proof » | Pride: Open Trackbacks » | Wrath: Who needs a spanking? » | Pride: Estrogen Alert » | Sloth: Chewy » | Pride: Ethanol News » | Sloth: Classic SNL Moment » | Pride: One Less » | Envy: Frenchies » 

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 

Envy: I want that truck

Can you seriously believe that Sinner gave me, trouble, the keys to this place? I know he expected that I would talk nonstop about sluttiness, boobs, and partial nudity the entire time. I'm not right. I have no problem doing quite a few thing that decent polite people avoid like the plague.

For instance, I talk to crazy people. It drives the chef nuts. He worries about my safety, but I'm almost never worried.

I suppose that inside my head, crazy is kind of a spectrum. I know I'm not on the right end of the spectrum, so I tend to be rather non-judgemental about other people's mental health issues. As the chef always says, "everybody got their somethin'."

On Sunday, the chef and I were in a convenience store in the hood (where the chef and the rest of the other half lives) and I, of course, wine connoisseur that I am, had to comment on their broad selection of cheap wine, including Boone's Farm and Wild Irish Rose. I hadn't seen those brands in years, since I was a college girl, during which period of time I used to drink every single brand represented in front of the counter. The chef clearly wasn't into the conversation, but I felt it warranted further discussion, so instead, I struck up a conversation with a freaky black chick in a leopard print mumu who was in line behind us. We talked for a little while about the weather, Boone's Farm, and the approaching hurricane. It was a pleasant, innocuous discussion with a stranger.

The chef glared at me out of the corner of his eye the entire time I was talking to her. When we got outside, he said, "Why do you always have to talk to the homeless crackheads? It's not safe."

"She's not homeless," I said, "She has a nice truck," and I pointed to a new, white crew-cab F-150 pickup that had been left running next to the door.

He said, "How do you know that's her truck?"

"The leopard seat and steering wheel covers match her mumu. Oh, and the pink hubcaps, seem to fit her, too."

He replied, "Oh. I guess when she pulled a wad of cash out from under her titty to pay for her drink, it threw me off."

Hey, nothing says class like keeping your assets under your assets.

| | Trackback URI

Blog Info

Praise for The 7 Deadly Sins


"I have to admit that you do sloth like nobody's business."
- tee bee
"omg...you're even nerdier than my bf. That's hawt."
- trouble
"Not everybody remembers the glow of green text on black monitor with fondness"
- cathyf
"That's just crazy talk"
- tee bee
"Holy crap! Where's the ACLU pukes this time?"
- justanothermngirl
"Quick, edit these before anyone sees them!"
- Chris
"See? Getting old isn't all bad."
- David
"THIS IS GOOD, SPREAD THE WORD."
- RICHARD
"Best wishes to my Blog Brother."
- Retired Geezer
"Congratulations to one sinner from another."
- basil
"I just sic them on punks like that like a couple of pitbulls."
- digitalbrownshirt
"I hate to say anything negative about someone I've never met (OK, that's a lie), but that guy is a $#@*& idiot."
- John from WuzzaDem

Video Game Voters Network

My Blogfather

Feed The Sins



Weblog Commenting and Trackback by HaloScan.com

Open Trackback Alliance

Open Trackback Alliance


101st Fighting
Keyboarders



Powered by Blogger and Blogger Templates
Listed on BlogShares



Top100 Bloggers
Top 100